Saturday, March 14, 2009

I've seen your movie Bill Mahr.

I've watched your HBO show as well.

I'm one of the many that likes to see smart people hash out serious issues (Stewart has done his bit, even if Colbert is way ahead of him as far as being funny goes) I'm just a lowly lowly blogger. I don't even bother to update this thing in a timely fashion. As far as my personal life goes, this is just the tip of the iceberg that killed the Titanic.

So I won't pick on your face that resembles a half-melted Sean Penn. The fact that you constantly giggle at your own jokes to what, remind us we're supposed to be laughing at them? I hesitate to identify myself as liberal when people like yourself are at the forefront. Michael Moore, with all his mind-numbingly cloying impetuosity, is funnier if in a cutesy sorta way. Mahr -- you are not cute. You radiate smarm and self-satisfaction and you defer to your knee-jerkoff, crass sense of humor whenever someone challenges you. When you entered the truckstop chapel (a trailer wherein Mahr proceeded to berate their ritual seemingly in the midst of it) and spouted off it wasn't ballsy, just tactless and rude. These guys, whatever you think about their beliefs, don't need to be talked down to by a greasy lizard like yourself. And those "off-the-cuff" ride along interludes are nauseating, leaving only Larry Charles to laugh at your canned crap--I DON'T CARE -- EVEN IF YOU IMPROVISED THAT SHIT, IT IS BOTTOM SHELF PUREED, CANNED CORN. The biggest lesson I learned from your shrill, wack-ass patronize-the-world-ask-questions-later walkabout is that you would be one the worst people EVER to accompany on a road trip.

I'll try not talk about any of these things. Because I queued this shit up. And I watched Real Time, even when I began to notice that Ben Affleck was a recurring guest. The matter at hand is why. Perhaps I'm more agnostic than aetheist, but I have duly seen how religion has been used to justify all levels of atrocity and find it horrifyingly fascinating. It's a direction. Something some of us at a certain point in our lives are utterly, despairingly lacking. So it's a sort of power. An exclusivity. I'm determined to find my way without religion, but I can honestly say I'm more impressed with any given religious body's tenacity than I am Mahrs unfailing, head-shaking chagrin.

After watching this film, I get the sense that I am religious. I'm religious enough to believe that something I do might matter to somebody else besides myself. I'm religious enough to be guilty. I'm religious enough to live in denial. I'm religious enough to entertain fantasy possibilities that are appealing to me on a profound and endearing level. Religious enough to be nostalgic. I guess what I'm saying is -- world in crisis or no -- leave us weirdos alone you snickering, L.A. Looks oozing iguana you! What do you just want everything you come across to be form-fitted to your exalted level of bullet comprehension? Some of us are trying to figure shit out in our own way and sticking your beak in and throwing out your DOA one-liners doesn't come across as a genuine desire to do the same.

Maybe I was drawn to Religulous because I empathize with irreverence and, despite a distaste for the "comedian," I can identify with much of his sentiments. What watching this dweeby op-ed video magazine really hit home is how superficial my enjoyment of him and leadenly brash pundits like him is. It's aggro-fluff for my latent inner self-righteousness. He's high on himself and making a living at it. Jeez, what a waste of bloody time all his nonsense has been! I'm no doubt stating the obvious for my case as heavy-thumbedly as Mr. Skeevy Open-Shirt-and-Blazer did for his own. I just hope that there's something more Borat or Curb Your Enthusiasm caliber down the line from Larry Charles. For a movie that's got a whole lot more to say without nearly as much lip-flapping, I highly recommend checking out the awesome 1982 film Koyaanisqatsi:

I just did over ther at Hulu and it's possibly one of the awesomest things alive. Next time I'll talk about something more in line with this. These negative vibes are killing me. Just killing me!

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